Thursday September 8, 2005

Thursday September 8th, 2005 Zack was lying in bed awake when I arrived with a smile on his face. I told him Happy 16th Birthday and he said, “Wake me up and take me for a walk”. He quickly eats breakfast and off we go. I tell him I am speaking at Christian Academy chapel today and he said he wishes I were speaking here (meaning Frazier). As we walked the halls he told everyone it was his birthday and we took a lot of picture with other patients and the staff. He is very happy. I told him Sweet 16 and never been kissed and he said, “Oh, I’ve been kissed”. 9:00 Speech with Amy (Kathy was off today). He has trouble identifying objects but did great (95%) on answering yes/no questions (Is a rose a fruit?). Sentence completion also went well (the football player jumped this way)
He completed compound sentences (If you are tired then you take a break) and got 100% of following multiple commands. He is doing so much better in speech but he still gets stuck on a word and uses it a lot. P.T. with Rita (Amy is off today) and she had him on the exercise bike for 10 minutes. Then they tossed a ball and caught it on a Velcro paddle. His eye hand coordination was excellent and he really enjoyed it. Rita had him run down the hall while tossing a beach ball back and forth with Ryan (our U of L student shadowing us today). He laughed the whole time. She had him doing many other things while throwing the ball (like walking on a balance beam) and he never got tired or complained. He seemed to enjoy it. When he arrived back to the room someone had decorated the door (I think it was the staff) and the Rivards had delivered a big basket full of fancy cookies. He ate some goodies and then said, “I think I would like to sleep on my birthday”. O.T. therapy with Dawn (filling in for Mary Beth) and she has him work a puzzle. He did it completely and quickly (this puzzle had him very frustrated last week). He got his picture taken in the Frazier car for his 16th birthday. Back in his room he took a nap and then ate lunch. He was immediately ready to go back to therapy but there was an hour to kill. He decides to get back in bed and watch TV. Rita (Scott’s Mom) is with him and she has to watch rap videos. A note to Grandmothers…that is true love. Rita is with Zack today while I am at Christian Academy Chapel. I was very nervous to be speaking to the high school class and driving there I thought I would have to pull over and throw up. Scott and I were asked to come on stage at the end of the Middle School chapel so they could pray for us. I told them to pray that I would remember to breath. The Chapel program for high school was amazing. I got through my speech and only came close to breaking down once. I saw many teenagers impacted by the pictures of Zack in ICU and my words of warning to listen to their parents and make wise decisions. Taylor Barton performed the song he wrote and it was perfect even though I know Taylor was nervous (I held his sweaty hand). I held it together pretty well and then Mrs. Rafla read the “Beautiful Hands” poem that Donna had written about me. That did me in and I bawled like a baby (as much as the teenage girls behind me). Everyone sang Happy Birthday to Zack and we were moved by the raw love in the room. God was with us there today and I am sure tonight he will whisper to Zack in his dreams about how he has impacted so many teenagers. I arrived back at Frazier in time to take Zack to the gym for afternoon P.T. He heard Rita and I talking about University Hospital and he wanted to know what we were talking about. He said, “For what wrong with me it’s better that I am here”. How is that for insight! He works with Gina (a Southeast member) and she has him sidestepping on the balance beam (he thinks it’s easy). She starts a more physical workout with push-ups and sit-ups and although he doesn’t complain he has to struggle through them. Back up to the room for a short nap and then we head back to the gym for O.T. Zack wears a funny, Hugh birthday hat that Penny (Scott’s aunt) had brought for him and carried a balloon that said happy birthday. When we arrive Mary Beth is not quite ready for us and Zack looks around. He asks me, “Have you figured out how to get out of here”. At times I think that Zack thinks we are both here in therapy. My therapy occurs on this keyboard every night. Mary Beth has him work with money again but this time she doesn’t have to write it down. She gives him a stack of various coins and asked him to give her different amounts. He gets them right away. She puts him on the computer to ski, play soccer and a card game that he figured out how to play before Mary Beth and I. He did very well on the computer games even though she increased the speed. He is very cooperative and will do whatever Mary Beth ask. We go back to the room and wait for dinner. My nieces arrive (Shannon and Erica) and bring Zack a birthday present. It is a 12x12 ceramic tile with his picture on it surrounded by the signatures of all his friends. The heading says “Surrounded by Prayer” and the bottom says, “Stay the Course”. It is a perfect memento of the last 2 months. Soon his friends start to arrive with cards, cakes and gifts. They all put on the funny birthday hats that Penny brought and follow Zack to the courtyard. It is quite a sight to see Zack (with a balloon tied to his helmet) being followed by a dozen teenagers in funny hats. We go back and forth between the courtyard and the conference room. He raps the 23 Psalm for them and they sing Happy Birthday. He manages the crowd (at times 35 teenagers) and the noise quite well. He is smiling and laughing and as soon it gets to be too much he says, “Let’s go” and we are off on another walk. He leads the pack and seems to walk all of the stimulation off. Once he takes us to the next place he is ready to sit down and enjoy their company again. Monica and Mark (another brain injury survivor) Key arrive with a special birthday present. A shiny, silver helmet autographed by Pat Day (the jockey). Zack thinks it is very cool and poses for another round of pictures. Finally it is time for everyone to leave and they help me carry all the cakes and presents back to his room. He climbs in bed and I start to clean up. I notice him just lying there staring at the ceiling. For the first time today he looks rather sad. I ask him what is wrong and he shrugs his shoulders. Then he tells me, “The depth of me missing this program”. I think in his own profound way he was saying that he was a missing out on thing and it hurt deep down. He knows today is his 16th birthday and although we had a great party he knows he is still at Frazier and not going home for two more weeks. It is not the 16th birthday he envisioned. He falls asleep and I call Scott and fill him in on the evening. He likes Zack’s friends and knows that it is important that they are here, but he likes to be with Zack when they can be alone. Scott was at Chapel today, hiding in the back of the room so no one would see him crying. He gets very emotional when he thinks about Zack. He told me tonight that he saw the impact Zack’s accident was making on other teenagers and it was like we sacrificed him for a noble cause. He frequently comments that it is hard to believe that this tragedy has turned into something good…a way to reach hundreds of teenagers. We are reminded of the first thing Zack typed on the computer since his accident. “zackistheonlywaytoshowyou”. That is why we are here. God has been preparing us for a long time to be ready for the message that he has to tell through Zack. I hope everyone is listening because sometimes God whispers and sometimes he sends thunder…Zack is thunder! Keep praying.