Monday December 26, 2005

Monday December 26, 2005 Christmas Eve we went to the 3:00 service at Southeast Christian Church and although we were running late and it was very crowded we all got to sit together on the first floor. Of course the whole family was dressed up and Zack wore his hat (like my Daddy’s). After church we went to Scott’s aunt and uncle’s house, which is a family tradition. The only difference is that my Mom was not feeling well enough to go with us but we will pick her up later. At least she would be able to spend the night and be with us Christmas morning. Scott’s brother Jay was in from Florida and got to see Zack for the first time since University Hospital. He has been following his progress on the website and getting updates from his Mom but it is quite different when you see him in person. Jay hugged him and tears welled up in his eyes. Zack asked him if he knew that he had an accident and Jay explained that he came to see him in the hospital. We opened presents after dinner and Zack was genuinely grateful for each gift. His cousin Garrett had burned him a CD of U2’s greatest hits and Zack had to call him in Chicago to thank him. Scott left early to pick my Mom up and we listened to Zack’s new CD on the ride home. My Mom enjoyed playing the card game “golf” with Zack before he headed for bed. Once all the kids were asleep Scott and I began putting presents around the tree. Then we had to sneak downstairs without waking Zack up and put together the Ping Pong Table we got them. By 1:00 AM everything is done and we head to bed anticipating an early morning.
Tuesday Christmas Day Logan was the first one up and excitedly ran downstairs to see that Santa had come. Scott had the coffee ready by the time all of us gathered in the family room. We settled in a circle and held hands and Zack prayed. He thanked God that we were all able to be together and that he was “no longer wrecked”. He reminded us to be thankful for whatever we got “even if we didn’t like it”. Kyle began to pass out presents and Zack sat on the couch and watched as his little sisters opened presents. He opened a few and then went to his room to get the presents that he had personally picked for each one of us. I opened a pair of earrings that he said were very sexy and he gave Scott a traveling coffee mug with a handwritten note inside. He thanked his Dad for “being there since the beginning” and his “Christian ways” and told him how much he loved him. Zack could not have given his Dad a better present. My Mom cried when I gave her a framed picture of Zack inscribed with Rev 21:5 “He makes all things new”. Zack went back to bed and I took my Mom to church before taking her back home. At 2:00 we headed to Rita & Louie’s (Scotts parents) for Christmas dinner and more gifts. Rita always goes overboard with big bags of presents and it takes hours to open everything. Zack was sitting on the couch with me watching Dylan dig through his bag and he told me, “Next year I’m not going to be a kid ‘cause I just want to sit on the couch and watch everyone else open their presents”. He said he didn’t want anything because he already had a great Christmas. That was before he opened a box that contained 50 $1 bills. Then he carefully opened each box in search for “more cash”. We stayed through dessert and then went to the Jaha’s for Christmas Open House. We were the first family to arrive so I played pool with Zack. As Donna was putting food out Zack asked me if they knew he was in an accident. I explained that Donna was there everyday and when I had to go back to work she would stay with him. I gave Donna a framed picture of Zack, her and I together with the Revelations inscription and a single picture of Zack in a magnet frame for her refrigerator. She put it on the refrigerator and showed it to Zack. He smiled and said, “My Mom told me you were at the hospital a lot…thanks for that”.
Before long there were many friends there and all were amazed to see Zack laughing and playing pool. Driving home I asked Zack if he remembered Christmas from the past and he said no. I prodded him to try to remember but he said he can only remember the feeling it gave him. We talked about what he does remember and I realize that he really only remembers the “feelings” associated with people or events, not anything that actually happened. He told me the girl he dated for a long time (Marissa), that he didn’t really remember dating her but he remembers that it was good. He said he knows he played baseball, that he pitched but he doesn’t remember any details. I asked him if it bothered him that he doesn’t remember those things and he said no, he has the feelings of them. He said he sings in church more now and he knows he is closer to Jesus. I ask him if he feels like God has drawn him closer, he nods yes and says “that’s good”. Then he smiles, turns the radio up and starts singing. We pull in the driveway and he turns the radio down and says we had a really good day today. I agree and he asks if I’m ready for him to whoop me in pool. We head downstairs and he beats me 4 games of Ping Pong and 3 games of pool. Finally he says he thinks I have had enough and tells me goodnight.
Once everyone is in bed I go around turning off Christmas lights and pondering the events of the day. It had made me sad to think that Zack didn’t remember any past Christmas or scoring in a ball game. But then I thought about what he had said. He had the “feelings” of those memories and that is the best part anyway. We can dwell on what we don’t have any more and feel sorry for ourselves or we can focus on what we still have and be thankful. We have Zack showing us how to be happy despite his circumstance. We have my Mom another Christmas morning experiencing the joy of children opening presents. We have the knowledge that our loving Father hears our prayers and wants to give us the desires of our heart. We have a stronger faith, a trust that He is in control and a joy that passes all understanding. Merry Christmas and continue praying for complete recovery in the New Year!