Saturday January 14, 2006

Saturday January 14, 2006 We have had a busy last few days. Thursday morning Carol Britton from Christian Academy Discovery program came to observe Zack in Speech and Occupational therapy with the goal to start working with him on Rhythmic Writing. She called me later in the afternoon to say how much she enjoyed meeting him. She saw how cooperative he was and how hard he works. She laughed when she said that between sessions Zack asked her if she wanted to go to lunch when they were through and told her he was excited about going to the Winter Ball this weekend. She found him full of personality, said that we have a very special son and expects to have fun working with him. We discussed Zack returning to school at the end of February for two days a week and then continuing his therapy at Frazier East the other three days. Carol suggested that he would benefit from math classes and Bible. She feels that once he starts back in the Fall he could be a successful student with help from the Discovery program. When I pulled up to the house after work I realized we were the only people on our street with outside Christmas decorations still up. I walked in to find Scott napping on the couch and he informed me that he had had a hard day at work and was in no mood to take down decorations. I looked at Zack and asked if he would help me and he said Rick was picking him up to go bowling but he could help me till he left. In twenty minutes all the lights and wreaths were down without one complaint from Zack. I couldn’t help but think about last year when I had to nearly threaten him to get them down and he moaned the entire time. When Zack and Rick came home Zack proudly announced he bowled a 172 and then wanted to beat me in cards. He certainly hasn’t lost his competitive edge.
Friday was Kyle’s 10th birthday and Scott dropped the kids off to school while Zack and I went to Kroger’s to pick her up a cake. When we got to Christian Academy Zack knocked on her classroom door and much to her surprise delivered her cake. He asked if we could walk to the high school wing so he might see some of his friends. As we continued down the hall he started to giggle and said (pointing to his ears) “I can’t believe I can walk in here with these on!” (CAL doesn’t allow boys to wear earrings). We got there just as homeroom let out and the halls filled with students. Zack was in heaven as guys walked pass giving him the “high five” and girls came up to hug him. He got to see all his friends and told them that he would be coming back to school in February. They went to class and we headed to the front door and ran into Mr. Greener in the hall. He shook Zack’s hand and asked him how it felt to be walking the halls at school again. Zack informed him that he was going to be back there soon and I told Mr. Greener that Zack was tickled over getting to wear his earrings. We all laughed and Mr. Greener warned him to enjoy it now because when he came back the earrings came out. Zack was flying high as we drove to Frazier. We hardly noticed that it was pouring down rain because we were both so excited about the prospect of him returning to school. Christian Academy has supported us with prayer and fundraisers since Zack’s accident. We feel part of a special family bound together by our belief in Christ and God’s purpose in healing Zack. When I come back to pick Zack up at the end of the day he tells me I need to come in and talk with Leslie (speech therapist). We talk about Carols visit and she tells me she had a phone message from the Brain Injury Trust Fund wanting her opinion of the Rhythmic Writing and Instrumental Enrichment program (I had contacted them for financial assistance). Leslie wanted to talk with me before she returned their call and I knew what she was going to say. She is not familiar with these programs and feel they are not really applicable to Zack since he does not have a learning disability but a brain injury. They are very reluctant to consider anything outside of the normal methods of therapy that they were educated in. She told me that she would tell the Trust Fund that Zack could benefit from the program but it was not necessary to his recovery. She would instead tell them that Zack could use a laptop and software programs that could help him organize his notes once he returned to school. Leslie thanked me for trusting them with Zack, told me he was very intelligent and a joy to work with BUT school was going to be very hard and he was going to need a lot of help just to get passing grades. She has talked to Zack about how his language problems (aphasia) will hamper him in every subject and that they would be delighted if he was able to get C’s in school. I reminded her that we expected the aphasia to continue to get better and she said that that is what they hoped. As we drove home Zack asked what we talked about. I told him that we discussed his return to school and that she warned me how difficult it was going to be for him. He looked at me and said, “She doesn’t think I can do it. She thinks I’m going to get D’s and F’s but I’m going to work really hard and prove I can do it”. I told him that she said he was very smart and a joy to work with but she just doesn’t have the faith in him that we do. He would have to work very hard and get good grades and then maybe we could prove them wrong. He said, “It makes me kind of mad that they don’t think I can do it. I might get some C’s but I am going to work hard and I will get some A’s and B’s too”. I don’t know if that is possible, and we will be very happy with C’s, but with Zack’s determination (and help from Carol) he could surprise us all. It dawned on me again, much like it did after the first two weeks at University Hospital, that all the professionals look at Zack as the typical patient with a brain injury. They have always presented him to us in the worse possible scenario. His doctors thought he would be a vegetable and then as he improved a little they said we should look at nursing homes. They tried to convince me that Frazier Rehab would never take him and they did. At Frazier they warned me about all these scary phases he would go through that never appeared. I remember Dr. Calvery (psychologist) telling me she would like to see more frustration from Zack and warned me of the severe depression that was sure to follow but it never came. Everyone expects him to fit some kind of brain injury textbook case and still they do not consider one very important factor…the power of prayer. God has carried Zack in the palm of His hand. He has whispered words of encouragement to him when there was little hope. I am reminded of the day at Frazier Rehab when I was working on the computer in Zack’s room while he slept. He woke up and I went to sit next to his bed to talk to him. He really wasn’t talking much at this point but he pointed to the computer. I asked him if he wanted to type and he said yes. I put the laptop in his bed and I typed “Zack” and told him that was his name. He placed his hands on the keys and slowly typed “zackistheonlywayttoshowyou”. I was reading it while he typed and even with no spaces knew what he was saying. Chills ran up my spine and I asked him what it meant. He said, “I don’t know”. I asked him if he was done or wanted to type some more and he said that was all. I saved it on the laptop and quickly called Scott and Donna. That statement, “Zack is the only way to show you”, has come to mean so much to us in many different ways. It was my encouragement to speak to other teenagers at local schools and churches. Zack was my example to show them how seemingly innocent choices can change their lives forever. I remember the first time I went to the Vine Sunday night service at Southeast Christian church and watched Zack sing with eyes closed and hands lifted. He showed me how to worship. The doctors and therapist are all very good at what they do BUT they lack faith. Now Zack will show them how to overcome impossible odds through faith. I don’t know what the future holds. I am not naïve enough to think it won’t be hard. Maybe Zack will show them by excelling in school or maybe he will show them that he can still have a positive attitude and just get passing grades. All I am certain of is that God has not brought us this far, overcoming major obstacles, for us to become discouraged. Zack will continue to show us whatever God wants to reveal. Zack and I continue our discussion about school and that it will be hard and he will need tutoring in every class but we know he can do it. I tell him, “Remember, I can do all things…” and he interrupts with “…through Christ who gives me strength”. I told him that will be his motto and he can be a silent witness to his therapist just like he was to his doctors. When we arrive home we make plans to take Kyle out to dinner for her birthday. Dylan had plans to go ice skating and Logan was staying with our neighbor so Kyle, Zack, Scott and I go to Outback Steakhouse. The four of us had a great time and ran into the English’s. Dan English was Dylan’s football and basketball coach and they watched him and the girls a lot when we were constantly at University Hospital after the accident. Dena came and sat with us amazed that she was having a conversation with Zack and that he looks so good. Zack and I went over to say hello to Dan and he told Zack that he saw him at the hospital shortly after the accident. Zack told him that he was really messed up then but he is doing good now and is going to be back in school in February. We experience such a different outlook from them. They reminded Zack that their whole family has been praying for him everyday and they know he will continue to get better. They have faith in him too. Or rather they have faith that God can do miraculous things. Again my thoughts turn to the promise in scripture as Jesus tells us in Mathew 17:20 “I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you”.
Saturday I prepare to paint Kyle’s room and Zack helps me wrestle the bed out of her room. We work for fifteen minutes trying to get it out and finally it was Zack who figured out how to do it. After painting all day (thanks for the help from my sister Colleen) I finish with just enough time to clean up and take Zack to pick up his flowers for the dance. He looked very handsome in his suit with his hair fixed to wear no scars could be seen. We meet the rest of his friends at the Raines house for pictures and I watch him pile with the rest of them into a limo and head to the Winter Ball. I drive home with a smile on my face thinking “Ha, they thought he would never walk again and now he is off to a dance”. Scott and I meet for dinner with the Jaha’s and I tell Donna everything that has been going on with the Neuro Psych Exam and our plan to start Rhythmic Writing. She too has faith because she has seen Zack struggle through each phase and come out on top. She knows the power of prayer and reminds me that it doesn’t matter what grades Zack gets or what his therapist think will happen when he returns to school. Zack has already succeeded. When we get home Zack is laying on the couch talking with Tiffany (she watched the kids for us tonight). I ask him about the dance and he told me he had a lot of fun. He danced with a lot of different people and now he was very tired. He went to bed and we said goodbye to Tiffany. I fall asleep not discouraged but full of hope and a little anxious to see what God will do next. Zack still has aphasia and it will hamper his success in school. He still has a visual perception problem that makes it difficult to read which will also be a struggle in school. But we believe he can overcome these things and, whether he gets good grades or not, be successful. We ask for your continued prayers for Zack’s complete recovery. We pray that God will use Zack as a tool to witness to those who don’t understand the power of prayer that they may be convicted and see His mercy and glory. I have cried silent tears of hope through most of this posting and leave you to dwell on the promises of scripture.
James 1:2 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”
1 Peter 1:6 “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith-of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire-may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.”