Thursday November 3, 2005

Thursday November 3, 2005 Zack was back on his weekday schedule and up at 7:00. I fixed him a big breakfast as a treat and he kept thanking me. On the way to Frazier East we talked about his plans for the weekend. My niece Erica had called earlier in the week and offered to be the cool, slightly older cousin who could take him and some friends to the movies. This way he doesn’t have to feel like his Mom is driving him around and I don’t have to worry about him riding in a car full of teenagers (with a driver that has had their license less than 6 months). I told Zack that Erica wanted to take them to the movies and we talked about who might go. We also talked about girls is general and his desire to kiss someone. I am in a unique position because I have a teenage son who will freely discuss his feeling and listen to my advice. He still has his own opinions but he doesn’t think I’m stupid any more. I think the last four months of him relying on me to take care of life threatening issues has opened his eyes to the value of parents…I hope.
Zack had two sessions of speech with Megan where he worked on reading, word retrieval and sentence correction. We still have not heard when his Neuro Phych exam will be scheduled. It appears we are waiting on insurance approval. He has to take this exam before going back to school so we are anxious to get it scheduled. Scott called me to say that Buddy Jaha had offered him two tickets to the U of L football game for tonight so he could take Zack. They are getting in a lot of Father/Son bonding with golf yesterday and football tonight. I was at a neighbors getting help with some website issues when Dylan knocks on the door to tell me that Scott wanted me to call him. He wanted to tell me how happy he was just watching Zack enjoy the game. They met up with Trey and Andrew and saw several other people he knew. Zack was really into the game and it gave Scott great joy to watch him. Scott was emotional as he told me how much he loved him and how sweet Zack was. At first Zack was anxious to get home to meet an old girlfriend he said was stopping by the house but then he was into the game and said he wanted to stay until the end. By half time though he was tired and ready to go home. When he walked in the door he told me that he had a lot of fun but was very tired. He went right to bed and Scott and I talked about how fortunate we are. Another blessing that we have right now is that Zack appears to appreciate what we have been through and seems to realize that we might know a thing or two after all. How nice is it to have a teenager that knows you’re not an idiot? Maybe some of that “underdeveloped frontal lobe” speech he has heard me making has actually sunk in. His short term memory and the aphasia are still a daily battle. He has to keep asking us the names of friends that he wants to call or says things like, “What is that thing I want to do tomorrow?” when he is talking about going to the movies. I talk to many normal adults who can’t remember people’s names (half the time I call my kids by the wrong name) and they are not as sweet as Zack. We are blessed to have him. We are blessed to have gotten to know many of his friends (and met new teenagers) in a deeper way. We are given a glimpse, up close of how difficult it is to be a teenager. We remember the peer pressure and can appreciate their struggles. They need us and most of the time (though they won’t admit it) they know that the boundaries and rules we set are because we love them and want to protect them. They don’t think they need protecting and that’s were the struggle begins. Tough love. It’s impossible to raise teenagers without it. It is not easy being the parent that sets the rules, who checks up on what their teenager is doing, who calls and verifies plans. But it is a lot easier than seeing your child lying in a hospital bed, praying they will live, or walk and talk again. Free will. Our creator designed us with the ability to make our own choices but he also designed parents and gave them the responsibility of training their children to make good choices. We can’t give up or take the easy way out. I ask for prayers for all parents of teenagers that they will be strong in their convictions. I pray that the hand of God will be ever present in Zack’s recovery guiding us to make the right decisions. Please pray for his continued complete recovery.