Sunday October 30, 2005

Sunday October 30, 2005 Zack got up at 9:00 with his friends and ate donuts before getting ready for church. He kept asking if he could ride to church with Andrew and I had to explain again why it was too soon after his accident to let him ride with other teenage drivers. Trey left with Andrew and Dan volunteered to ride with Zack so he wouldn’t feel so “weird”. Scott drops them off to worship with the high school while we go to big church. When we get out Zack is waiting for us in the atrium with Kara and Trey. They want to go to the mall and Zack says he knows I won’t let him ride with them. I tell him he looks really tired and maybe he would rather go home and rest but he insist he feels fine and wants to go with his friends. Once we get in the car he asked for my cell phone. He tells me he is going to call them and tell them to forget it. He is really tired and would rather go home and take a nap (his idea but I planted it). The girls go to Rita’s, Dylan goes with a friend to play golf and Scott has to finish a job, so Zack and I go home alone. Zack eats a quick lunch and is asleep before I can finish eating. The house is quiet and I get a chance to catch up on some reading (all brain injury stuff…real exciting). When Zack wakes up he is anxious to get out and do something. We head to church for the Sunday night Vine service and stop for something to eat at Taco Bell. When we arrive in the sanctuary we are searching for other friends that said they would be there. He finds a group of friends and we take our place in time for worship. Zack sings familiar songs and smiles at me as if to say this is where we need to be. Dave Stone is preaching and Zack is listening intently. He leans over and asked me, “How much does he make?” speaking about Dave. I tell him I don’t know and he pauses and looks around before saying, “He should make a lot of money”. When I ask him why he says, “He’s good, look at all the people here”. Later as we sing and he watches Daniel Dabney lead worship he tells me, “Look at his face. It’s special”. I look again at the worship leader, playing the guitar, his eyes closed, faced lifted and singing praises to a merciful God. He looks peaceful, almost angelic. Now I can see what Zack sees. Zack seems to have an insightfulness, yet innocence about him now. He speaks truthfully, through child like eyes. I imagine that God is pleased with that. As we walk out of the sanctuary after making plans to meet some of his friends at Dairy Queen, Zack tells me that next time he is going to hold his hands up. He is referring to the way some of his friends worship, they sing and raise their hands. He comments that Ashley does it real good and he will do it next time. He comments that Daniel Dabney is really cool and when I ask him if he wants to go meet him he thinks it’s a good idea. We walk back in to the front of the sanctuary and find Daniel. I tell him we really enjoyed worship and he asked Zack how he was doing. Zack tells him he is doing good but wants to go back to school. We head to the parking lot and Zack is energized. I tell him I like to see him this excited about going to church and he says, “They do it really good here”. I definitely agree. We meet Ashley and several other friends at Dairy Queen and Zack has a shake while they eat. When we arrive home Tiffany is waiting and Zack visits with her for a little while. As soon as she leaves he is ready for bed (he needs to make up for lost sleep on Saturday night). Tomorrow after therapy Zack has a dentist appointment. Sometime in the last week he has lost a cap off his tooth. He hasn’t been able to wear his retainer in the last four months so all the work we have done since his braces were removed needs to be started over. Hopefully we can get things straightened out without putting him back in braces. I think he has been through enough lately. I feel at peace, contented, as we close the weekend. Our new normal, although at times quite overwhelming, brings us great joy. Zack has come so far in such a short time. He continues to amaze us even when we recognize his weaknesses. Our awesome God has blessed us beyond what we could have hoped for or imagined. Pray that we will continue to be amazed at Zack’s progress. Please pray for complete recovery for Gods Glory.
“Who am I, O Lord God…that You have brought me this far?” 2 Samual 7:18

Saturday October 29, 2005

Saturday October 29, 2005 Zack was up before me this morning. Scott had left for work early and I slept until after 9:00. Zack was in the living room playing Nintendo. When I went to the kitchen I noticed a bowl of orange juice on the counter. I asked Dylan about it and he said Zack did it. I was puzzled that Zack would drink orange juice out of a bowl when Dylan told me he put it on his cereal. I called Scott on the jobsite and told him that Zack had put orange juice on his cereal for breakfast and wasn’t expecting his reaction. He got very upset and emotional and told me he had to go. I told Dylan and Kyle that their Dad was upset by it and Kyle told me it wasn’t that weird. She said she remembered in preschool that when they ran out of milk they would ask kids if they wanted it with orange juice and several kids ate it that way. Zack came in and told me he was tired and was going back to bed. Since it was only 10:00 AM I told him it was too early for a nap and to come play cards with me. As we played the card game “Golf” I asked him if he knew that he had put orange juice on his cereal. He said that he wanted cereal and we were out of milk so he just used orange juice instead. I asked him if it was good and he said a little bit. I called Scott back to tell him that Zack didn’t confuse the orange juice for milk, he only used it because we were out of milk. This made Scott feel somewhat better but he explained that it just brings to reality that Zack is not the same as before. He would have never put Orange juice on cereal before his accident but that isn’t so terrible. I loaded Zack, Dylan and the girls up and we went to Waffle House for lunch before dropping Dylan off to tennis practice. Then I took Zack and the girls to Wellspring Christian Bookstore to buy him some new C.D.’s. Scott had confiscated all of the C.D.’s (a lot of kids bring music to Zack, mostly stuff they have burned themselves) and listened to them. Many songs were inappropriate and some were downright disgusting. I let Zack listen to dozens of Christian rap artist and we bought 5 new C.D.’s that he really likes. The beat sounds just like the secular stuff all the teens listen to but the words are pure. We leave the bookstore and drop Kyle off for basketball tryouts and then head to Dylan’s tennis match. Zack sits next to me and asked questions about tennis but he also wanted to go out in the car and listen to his new C.D.’s After the game, as we head back to pick up Kyle, Zack is on my cell phone making plans with his friends. When we arrive home several of his friends are waiting there for us. He decides to go with Dan and Tiffany to the Hurstbourne Baptist Youth Group bonfire. It is at someone’s house on ten acres and they have hay rides, play night games and lots of good food. It is a safe environment and we have several parents keeping their eyes on him (as well as his friends) so that Scott and I can go out to dinner. Zack is home at 10:00 PM with Tiffany and Dan. Several other friends come over to play pool and before I know if I have Dan, Andrew, Trey and Rick spending the night. We check in on them periodically and when I looked down at Zack at 1:00 AM he was a zombie on the couch trying to stay awake. He wants so much to be able to hang with the guys but it is so tiring for him. We are happy to provide a safe place for them all to hang out (as long as we can approve the music) because we have to be sure that Zack follows the rules. It is hard for him to understand why things are different for him. I explain to him repeatedly, while he begs me to let him ride with his friends, that it is very easy for him to hurt himself. I am paranoid about 2nd hand smoke (which causes seizures in people with brain injuries) and I know Zack would not make good decisions about what was safe (if he even remembered). We have to keep him close, try as much a possible to control his surroundings, educate his friends and try to teach him to be aware of what is dangerous. We are lucky that his friends have been through all of this with us from the beginning because they understand our concern and appreciate that we aren’t ready to give them the responsibility of keeping Zack safe when he is out. As he recovers our biggest challenge will be to make him aware that he can’t do exactly the same things as his friends (and say it in a way that doesn’t make him feel handicapped). Although it is not good for his friends to smoke, it is far more dangerous for Zack. Although his friends could have a car accident and get hurt, if Zack were with them a simple fender bender could re-injure an already bruised brain and send him back to the hospital. We pray that Zack is patient with us and understands that in time these restrictions will be lifted. We pray that his friends will be sympathetic to our situation and not make Zack feel pressured to go along with the crowd (and so far they have been nothing but supportive). It is harder and harder to see Zack’s deficits now as he has progressed so far, but he still has a brain injury, the aphasia is still present, his memory is weak, he doesn’t recognize his limitations and he is too precious to risk. Please pray that he will continue to recover completely. And pray with confidence as scripture has promised. 1 John 5:14 “This is the confidence which we have before Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.”

Friday October 28, 2005

Friday October 28, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 and I fixed sausage, eggs and pancakes. I felt after a couple days of cereal and Pop Tarts it was time for a good breakfast. He was still tired and quiet as we drove to Frazier East. I told him I would be with him at 10:00 for his meeting with Dr. Perri (psychologist). Dr. Perri needed me to fill in some missing information that Zack couldn’t remember, like his sleeping habits and physical condition before his accident. We talked about his visual perception difficulties, aphasia and attention deficit. All of these he expects to improve with time. He asked if I had seen any “anhedonia”, which is a loss of interest in things he used to enjoy, and I told him Zack wants to do all the same things as he did before the accident. He still wants to hang out with his friends, go bowling, play cards and has asked to go to the movies. He is starting to instant message his friends on the computer although that is harder for him. He can type like a pro but reading is difficult. We talked about the amount of sleep Zack is requiring and although Dr Perri says at this point it is not a problem, he would be concerned in the future if Zack was taking long naps and also sleeping 10 hours at night.
He works so hard in therapy that it wears him out but as he heals he should require less sleep. He asked Zack if he liked it there and Zack told him “a little bit”. I had to inform Dr Perri that Zack tells most people he doesn’t like it because there are “old people there who are weird”. Zack said that we (Dr Perri and I) weren’t old but we were “older”. Dr Perri mentioned the website and said that everyone there gets a little nervous when they see me writing but he thinks the whole idea is good. He suggested that he would like to spend some of his time with Zack reading the website and I told him to be sure to read the comments as well. Then he mentioned that they were talking about scheduling Zack’s Neuro Psych Exam which is an extensive day of cognitive testing (like the S.A.T.’s for brain injury). His therapy team isn’t sure that Zack is quite ready to take the exam yet but it is the first step to going back to school so we want to get it scheduled. Unfortunately there is 1 ½ month waiting list so at least that will give Zack more time for cognitive recall. The meeting was pleasant and informative. Zack proceeded to the gym for occupational therapy with Scott and then on to speech with Megan. I am glad that they are able to do two speech sessions a day because they work on reading, word retrieval and sequencing. I remember when we first arrived at Frazier Rehab I didn’t think much of speech therapy because all he ever did was work on swallowing. Back then I wanted physical therapy because that was where he learned to walk and hold his head up to midline again. Now the importance of those therapies has reversed. Zack doesn’t need as much physical therapy and speech therapy is the most significant. Occupational therapy has been kind of in the middle because in the beginning they worked on more physical aspects and now they do a lot of cognitive work. On the way home Zack was very tired and ready for a nap. I reminded him that we were going to the Varsity Football game at Christian Academy but he would have time to sleep before dinner. It was very cold at the game but Zack enjoyed himself immensely. He got to hang with “his people” and there were several of his friends there that had already graduated. He had to be the envy of many of the guys because he was constantly surrounded by girls. Since I am relegated to sitting with the parents, I feel much safer when the girls are with him. They are more attentive (quite nurturing) and they advise him when he wants to do something that is not a good idea (like take his hoodie off when it is 33 degrees). The guys can’t always think that way for themselves, as evident with 5 or 6 of the high school boys with their shirts off and chests painted for the game. We go to BW3’s after the game with a crew of his friends. Zack got upset with me because I wouldn’t left him ride with one of the girls but I am not ready to give any teenager that responsibility. My mistake came when I let Dylan ride with Kara to BW3’s and had to explain the whole way there why it was O.K. for Dylan but not Zack. It didn’t make any sense to Zack and I can understand why. This is one instance that I hope he doesn’t remember. While he was standing in line with Kara and Caroline, Dylan and I went to search for a table where there was no smoking in the area. Then I saw a table of girls from Eastern that got excited when they noticed Zack standing in line. I heard one girl comment that it was Zack and he was walking and another said that he talks too. I couldn’t help but giggle at their astonishment (but then I remember that his recovery is quite amazing). I go up to the counter and tell Zack that there were several girls from Eastern talking about him and of course that peaked his curiosity. We sat in the booth next to them and when I came back from the bathroom Zack looked like some kind of celebrity. He was in a booth with 5 girls and Jeremy, with another girl leaning over Jeremy to talk to Zack. The other guys standing around didn’t see any deficits…just one lucky guy surrounded by girls. As soon as I can figure out how to do it I promise to get new pictures on the website so those that don’t see him often can be encouraged. A bunch of kids came back to the house to play pool. They stayed until after midnight and Zack was pleased with their company but as soon as they left he went straight to bed. If he dreams tonight I’m sure it will be pleasant (as long as he doesn’t remember the ride to BW3’s). Everyone is astonished at how well he is doing and we feel so blessed that he has come this far so quickly. I pray that he will continue to amaze us and that God will bless us with complete recovery. I ask that you pray that his Neuro Psych Exam will go smoothly and that it will clarify he is ready to go back to school. Please pray that his vision screening will successfully pinpoint his perception problems and a clear course of action will be obvious. Praise God for the little victories and stand in reverent awe of His miracles!

Thursday October 27, 2005

Thursday October 27, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 and wanted cereal for breakfast. On the way to Frasier East I told him I would be there at 2:30 for the Team Meeting and his therapist would tell me how well he was doing. I also told him that we were going to meet the firemen that rescued him the night of the accident. I explained how the guardrail came through the windshield and cut his head and how they had to cut the top of the car off to get him out. I told him they thought he was dead and he said, “That’s good that I’m not dead”. I agree. I met with his therapy team at 2:30: Sandy Clark RN, Dr. Perri (psychologist), Leslie and Megan (speech) Suzanne and Scott (occupational).
There was not a physical therapist present but all they need to work on physically is endurance and strength. Speech and Occupational therapy at this point kind of overlap. They both work with him on attention to detail, awareness, impulsivity, perception and reading. His main deficits at this point are still language (aphasia) and visual perception (agnosia) but the aphasia has gotten much better. He is starting to recognize that many tasks are harder than they use to be therefore he will become more aware of his deficits. The more aware he becomes of his deficits (particularly if those deficits become permanent) the more likely he is to experience depression. He is at the beginning of the awareness stage. Cognitively and physically he works well (75% accurate) for 20 to 25 minutes before fatigue sets in. The more tired he becomes, the more impulsive he gets and the less attention or focus he maintains. Fatigue could be a deficit that remains for a long time. His reading has improved a lot this week but is hampered by the aphasia. They suggested that we label things around the house so that he will see written words and associate them with the object. Kyle will really enjoy making index labels and putting them throughout the house. This week they confirmed that he has visual perception problems and they suspect he has a “field cut”. This is when a section of his visual field is absent. It could be a pathway that is severed or actually a damaged nerve (which could not be repaired) or a combination of both. With a field cut a portion of his visual field is missing but he does not see it as a blank spot. His brain fills in the missing part which is not a problem if he is looking at a landscape or sky because the brain just fills in more sky at the missing section. However it becomes a real problem when you try to read because the brain doesn’t always know what letter to fill in. They have referred him to Dr. Weinberg for a Neuro Optometry Evaluation to determine exactly where the field cut is and how large it is. Then they can develop therapies to teach him to work around his deficit (much the same as you work with dyslexia). I have scheduled an appointment for Tuesday Nov 8th and hope that they discover only a small area that can easily be treated. They feel that we will find it on the right side because he still does not scan all the way around on that side. Scott took him to Kroger again today on a scavenger hunt. He asked him questions, like show me where the frozen foods are and has him scan visually from left to right. He stops at about 2:00 so this reminds me very much of “right side neglect” that we dealt with in the first month at Frasier Rehab. Scott also pointed out that Zack really needs to focus more on awareness to his surroundings especially when it comes to safety issues. He is likely to walk right into the traffic lane but Scott did say that he is listening and learning. On the way back from Kroger Zack remembered that he was supposed to do something because he asked Scott, “Am I supposed to stop and look here?” Dr. Perri said that Zack seems to do much better in group sessions and is impressed with his social skills. We can thank his friends for that because they have been socializing him since the first day of his accident. I told his therapist how his friends came to see him every day, played ball and cards with him, even when all he could play was “Go Fish”. I told them they still come everyday and play pool and he gets out to soccer and football games and his youth group as Southeast Christian Church. This is the reason that Zack does so well in group settings…thank you! In general they all agree that Zack is cooperative, he tries very hard, he is a pleasure to work with and is improving every day. They expect him to do very well and return to school but they are not prepared to say when that could happen. They want him to be at a point that he will be successful when he returns to school and right now it is too early to say when that could be. I pray that after we have our appointment with Dr. Weinberg they can develop an aggressive therapy that will help him recovery his reading skills. Zack had interrupted our meeting one time when he was done with his therapy. I told him he had a Seek–n-Find book in his binder and he needed to go work on it. When we were finished I found him in the therapy gym at a table working on a page in the book. He showed me how he had almost found every word but was ready to go home. He said he was very tired but I reminded him we were going to Middletown Fire Station. We got stuck on Gene Snyder Freeway behind an accident and were late arriving at the station. One of the firefighters was already gone but we got to meet Fireman Michael Williams. He was one of the first on the scene and had cut the roof off the car to get Zack out. He described how the airbag and dashboard were on his chest and they thought he was dead until they felt his pulse. He described how Zack started to fight when they intibated him and tried to pull the tube out of his mouth. It was a good sign that he was moving. They really didn’t expect him to live and Michael was very glad we came to see him. Unfortunately, the team working that night has been split up among 3 stations but we intend to visit the Lyndon Lane and the LaGrange Road station and meet the other firefighters that God used to save Zack that night. They invited us to come back and have dinner with them one day and we took pictures with the fire truck (Zack got in the drivers seat). I am looking forward to meeting the other firefighters and hearing their rendition of that night. I admire them greatly and now we are forever grateful for their skill that night. Zack wanted to meet them but now was ready for a nap. He was able to sleep for about 90 minutes before dinner and then I had to attend a middle school parent meeting. When I arrived back home there were several friends visiting with Zack. He has had so many people play a part in his recovery…the firefighters, surgeons, ICU nurses, therapist, doctors and Frazier nurses…but his friends have never failed him. They have been constant, faithful therapist by simply providing support, encouragement, acceptance and love. How blessed we are that God has placed them in his life. They may make bad choices sometimes but to us they show a Christ-like character as Peter described in 1 Peter 1:22 “Love one another fervently with a pure heart”. Praise God for your children. Pray that they will be caught in their disobedience so you can correct bad behavior. Pray that God gives you the courage to be a diligent parent and that your child will recognize it as love. Never give up teaching them how to make wise decisions. Cherish them because, even in their defiance, they need you. Please continue to pray for Zack’s complete recovery for Gods glory.

Wednesday October 26, 2005

Wednesday October 26, 2005 Zack woke up at 8:00 this morning because we forgot to set the alarm. We had to rush to get everyone fed and out the door in time for school so by the time Zack and I were on the road he was very concerned about being late. He told me again he needed to get his drivers license so that he would never have to be late. I have to remind myself that even though we may have this conversation every day about his driving, he doesn’t necessarily remember it. I know that Zack had Physical therapy, speech therapy and vision therapy today but his notes were difficult to understand (and of course he couldn’t explain it). I thought about calling Leslie (primary therapist) for an update but remembered that we have a team meeting tomorrow with his entire therapist. They will review his progress so far and give us some timelines. I don’t know if they will discuss when they expect him to be able to return to school but if you ask Zack he will tell you next week. On the way home Zack tells me he hasn’t kissed a girl in a long time. I told him it hasn’t been much more than 4 months ago and he said, “Mom that’s a really long time”. I puckered up but he told me that wasn’t the kind of kiss he wanted, not from his Mom. He was in a really good mood and had me laughing out loud several times. I told him he use to sing and dance all the time at Frasier Rehab and he said that he danced for them at school (he means Frasier East). He said he dances good and then wanted to know what I thought of his dancing. I told him he was a great dancer and also a good singer but I hadn’t heard him in a long time. He then proceeded to sing Amazing Grace and Better is One Day. He put his own funky style into it and again I was laughing. He told me he was tired and wanted to take a nap but he was also hungry. He decided he had to have a snack before his nap but as he finished his Pop Tart the doorbell rang. Andrew, Tiffany, Brittany and Kara came to play pool so he forgot all about his nap. We had to eat a quick dinner of left-overs before we were out the door heading for church. I needed to check Kyle into her class so I asked Dylan if he would make sure that Zack got to where he was going. Zack was offended so I asked him if he knew his home phone number (you need it to check into high school worship). He spouted it off and glared at me. He said he knew where to go and didn’t want Dylan following him around. I watched him walk in the door and realized that most people there knew him and if that wasn’t a safe place then I might as well lock him up. I checked Kyle into her class and was heading down to the atrium to find a quiet corner to work on my laptop when I ran into old friends from high school (well we are not that old). They asked how I had been and I realized that they had not heard about Zack. I found myself filling them in on his accident and recovery for the next hour and never opened my laptop. I wonder how many conversations I have a day that involve Zack. Scott said the same thing yesterday. He asked if I found myself talking about him all the time. It just seems like we have nothing more important to say than how God is healing Zack. There are so many reasons we can see why this accident happened and I am sure many more reasons we have yet to uncover. It would be a disservice to God not to tell everyone we meet of His mighty power and never ending grace. Thanks to everyone who continue to post stories of how Zack’s tragedy has touched someone they know. It enables us to feel the ripple effect through teenagers, parents, churches and strangers of answered prayers by an awesome God. God has promised “in all things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us” (Romans 8:37). Please pray for patience on Zack’s part to return to school and getting his drivers license. Pray that the vision therapy will make a drastic difference in his reading skills. Continue praying for complete recovery for God’s Glory.

Tuesday October 26, 2005

Tuesday October 26, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 and fixed his own breakfast, Pop Tarts.
He had vision therapy today, scanning pages to find a particular symbol that he had to circle. They are working on his reading which is the biggest obstacle keeping him out of school. Scott picked him up today so when I arrived home with Dylan and the girls there were already several of his friends hanging out. They were all talking about going to the Assumption vs South Oldham soccer game and Zack wanted to go. My last soccer game at South Oldham was an hour of torture sitting in the rain so I was trying to convince Zack that there were better things to do. When I told him that Christian Academy wasn’t even playing he replied, “It doesn’t matter. All my people will be there and I want to go”. I told him he was going to have to ask his Dad because I had already made other plans. Every 10 minutes he would ask if we could go to the game and I would have to explain all over again. His friends left and Zack told me it wasn’t fair that he couldn’t go. Finally I told him that I was sure other visitors were expecting him to be home and he decided that if people came to see him then it wasn’t so bad staying home but he still wanted to go to the game. Candy Slade, Kelsey and Conner stopped by to review fundraising material. Kelsey must have asked him how he was doing because he asked me, “How’d I mess myself up again?” A car accident. “Yeah, I had a car accident”. He took his hat off and they told him how good his head looked. Zack didn’t think so and replied, “No, it looks like crap. But I’m going to grow my hair and it will look better. I want my hair to grow so I don’t have to wear one of these all the time” (and points to his baseball cap). He is ever more conscious of his appearance. He has a small scar on his forehead that really bothers him and he wants me to get it fixed. We ate dinner and I headed to Kim Getz next door (my neighbor who did the laundry for several months). She was having a Mary Kay party and needed some warm bodies. I met two nurses that work at Care Tenders with Kim and they all knew Zack’s story. They got updated on his progress and told me how great he was doing. They knew several of Zack’s doctors, nurses and case worker so I told them about the journal. When Zack first arrived at Frazier Rehab I put a journal at the nurses’ station and asked everyone to write in it. Many of the nurses wrote several times over the 69 days he was with them. I had not been able to read it until last night. I was so touched and encouraged by what they wrote to him. They talked about how “sick” he was when he first arrived and how amazing his recovery was. They always spoke to him when they wrote and many told him how loved he was. There were even messages from nurses who never cared for him and weren’t even in the pediatric wing, but they knew him because he stood out. They always saw him walking with all his friends and they would come to his room to see the pictures and posters on his wall. They reminded him that he must be very special that so many people loved him. In the beginning, several nurses called him a “cutie” and by the end they were all saying they loved him and how much they were going to miss him. Even Dr. Mook (who use to tease me about the website) called him a remarkable young man and ended with “Remember, you can do all things through Christ”. It was an emotional reading and I was in tears through most of it. Our Frazier Family…we miss them too. Frazier East is hard work for Zack and he is anxious to go to school so he says he doesn’t like it there most of the time. But when we talk about Frazier Rehab, even though he doesn’t remember most of it or any ones name, he says he liked it there. I have come to realize that Zack may not remember specific events or what he did in therapy that day, but he has a “sense” about them. He knows if the day was good or bad and will say things like “I had a really good time last night” but he won’t remember exactly what he did. He won’t remember some ones name or a specific conversation but he remembers how they made him feel. I thought of how blessed we were that Zack has grown up learning scripture and attending church. He may find it difficult to learn knew things but in his long term memory lives the knowledge that God loves him. If he never learns to read that well again we are fortunate that he has memorized much of Gods Word. Our God is so merciful. Before everyone leaves Kim’s house Zack comes over to say hello. He looks like any other teenager. He is polite and says thank you when they all tell him how good he is doing. He takes off his hat and lets them examine his scar and exclaim how quickly his hair is growing. Then he turns to leave and asked me if he can go to bed (it is 9:00). I hang out next door looking at his photo album and talking about our miracle. We are truly blessed. The ripples of people touched by our tragedy seem never ending. I read the postings about how our website is traveling around the country and everyone seems to know who Zack is. His world exists pretty much with therapy, his family and immediate friends. He has no idea the people he has touched. And I am lucky to be touched by him and all those who follow his progress, send us encouragement, provide fabulous meals, offer to clean the house and continue to pray for recovery. And that is our hope…that our prayers reach even to the ears of God. That the throne of heaven has as His perfect plan Zack’s complete recovery. Keep praying.

Monday October 24, 2005

Monday October 24, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 this morning and was ready to go early. On the way to Frazier East he told me that he needed to get his drivers license. When I asked him why he was so anxious to start driving he said, “Because I’m 16!” I told him he would have to talk with his Occupational Therapist because she was the one who determined when he was ready to drive. He said, “Really, I have to talk to her? Will she be there today?” He is so anxious to start living his life again. He will have to take a special driving class (after his O.T. writes a letter recommending him for the class) before he can take the test, which is also different and much harder than the standard one everyone else takes. He might be ready but we can’t even think about him driving away in a car with his friends driving. When we arrive at Frazier he has a half hour before therapy begins and he says he is really tired. He lies down on a therapy mat in the gym thinking that he will get a quick nap in before the day starts. He only got to rest a few minutes before he was told he needed to write down his schedule. He uses a 3-ring binder and keeps a daily schedule and log of activities. This enables me to ask him questions, sometimes calling the therapist for clarifications, and keep track of his progress. His handwriting has improved a lot in the last two weeks. It actually isn’t much worse than before the accident (which isn’t saying a lot) but his spelling needs lots of work. He had two different sessions of speech therapy today (which is really what he needs) and also worked out with weights in P.T. He still needs to build up his endurance and his strength (especially on his right side). He really likes working with Scott (O.T. student) and I think it is because there are very few male therapists and he likes the male bonding. On the way home he told me he was very tired and wanted to take a nap really bad. I explained that he would have time for about an hour or so before we would be eating dinner. He wanted to wait until 7:00 to eat so that he would have longer time to sleep but I reminded him that his friends would probably be visiting tonight so he needed to be ready.
We didn’t have any visitors yesterday which worked out well. Scott had taken Zack and Dylan to watch the Packers football game in the afternoon. Zack was very disappointed that they lost. I ended up with a headache and took a nap (sorry I didn’t post). When Zack came home from the game he took a two hour nap and got up for dinner at 7:00. By 9:00 he was asking me if he could go to bed and I told him he had to wait until 10:00. He came in again at 9:30 pleading with me to let him go to sleep. Finally at 9:54 he kissed me and said it was over, he had to get in that bed.
After dinner Tiffany arrives, then Taylor and her Mom. Andrew comes in right before Brittany and Kara and then Avery and Caroline. All is well…Zack’s friends are here. They play pool and talk about the latest gossip, helping him be a normal teenager. This is the therapy that he enjoys, even when he is tired. Gradually they begin to leave and at 9:00 Zack starts talking about bed again. He manages to stay up another hour playing cards and pool with Scott before coming in to tell me goodnight. He is not singing and dancing like he was at Frazier Rehab (I think he got that out of his system) but he is still very sweet. I don’t know what other changes we might see in his personality but so far they have all been positive. I made arrangements today to speak to the Highland Baptist Youth Group at their Wednesday night gathering on November 16th. I read all the postings and agree that middle school students need to hear this message of “seemingly innocent choices”, parental authority and the power of prayer, as much as high school students. Other than through church youth groups the only way I know to reach these kids is through independent organizations (like the Fellowship of Christian Athletes). I will follow wherever God leads me. He has blessed us and continues to show mercy by healing Zack. To say that we feel lucky almost seems like an insult because the hand of God is far more powerful. His whisper changes lives just as his breathe created it. God has been preparing our family for many years to be a tool; although we couldn’t see it until His gentle hand wiped away the tears. He knew that “zack is the only way to show you” and therefore has turned a tragedy into a testimony to His Glory. I envision a “Stay the Course” ministry one day that has teenagers reaching out to other teens to hold them accountable for their actions. A source of information for parents to understand that, because of that underdeveloped frontal lobe, teenagers are not capable of always making good decisions so God gave parents authority and responsibility to help them make wise choices. Parenting (especially teenagers) is the most important, difficult and rewarding job God created. We need to embrace it and work at it as if working directly for God. I want to thank all of those who posted recently to let us know they are still reading and praying. We are seeing a lot of improvement with the aphasia and Zack has blossomed since coming home. We are humbled to realize that Dallas was not in God’s plan but how perfect our situation is now. Can you hear His whispering…wait until tomorrow! Continue praying for complete recovery and that His will be done. What a blessing is God’s perfect plan.

Psalm: 32:22 “The Lord redeems the soul of His servants, and none of those who trust in Him shall be condemned.”

Saturday October 22, 2005

Saturday October 22, 2005 Zack slept until nearly 11:00 today before getting up to eat cereal (Mamma don’t cook a big breakfast at 11:00) and take a shower. He informed me he was going to Trey’s today to hang out and I told him his Dad wanted to take him to watch football. He said O.K. Most of the time he is still very cooperative and compliant (a wonderful trait in a teenager…another blessing). I remind Scott that Zack has to be back by 2:00 because someone special was coming to talk with him and he said no problem since he had a big tennis match. Sidebar: Scott had been mouthing off to one of the other Dads whose son played football with Dylan and was now on the tennis team with him. Scott challenge Officer Brett Adkins to a tennis match and today was the big game. They had both been talking smack to each other but right before the game Brett informs Scott that he has played on a tennis team for the last three years and plays every week. Scott played in high school and hasn’t played in quite a while. Let’s just say although Scott didn’t win he didn’t embarrass himself. At 2:00 Scott Davis arrives to meet Zack. Scott had a snow plow accident when he was a senior at KCD and suffered a traumatic brain injury. It happened on Christmas Eve and he ended up at University, Frazier Rehab and Frazier East just like Zack. His story is great encouragement. He completed his senior year, got his Bachelors Degree in Economics at Duke University and is now at Vanderbilt getting his Masters in Economics. Although he didn’t have his scull removed he suffered more physical injuries/side effects than Zack. He was paralyzed on his right side and damaged the nerve to the left side of his face. His accident was six years ago this December and he just regained the ability to whistle last month. He also had aphasia but it was gone by the time he started college. He said Zack would do fine and had several advantages, namely no physical impairments. His advice to Zack was to not be embarrassed about his accident and try to hide it once he gets to college. Scott said that once he went to Duke he decided not to let anyone know of his injuries and became rather paranoid about it. After another KCD graduate that knew his story came to Duke the year after him, he found out that everyone already knew about the deficits he was trying to hide. He encouraged Zack to consider economics and told him if he ever wanted to tour Vanderbilt he would be glad to take him around. Scott left and Zack asked if we could go to the mall. Zack, the girls and I head to St Mathews and he hooks up with some friends there. It was very hard to leave him and shop with the girls, but since Andrew was with several girls that have been with Zack since his early days in the hospital, I felt I had to let him go. I cautioned the girls to keep him close and walked away. Zack had a good time walking around the mall for about an hour before Andrew called me and said they were leaving. We decide it’s time to leave and meet Scott and Dylan for dinner. In the car Zack tells me he had a good time but wants some friends to come over tonight. He makes calls from my cell phone and is content that he will have visitors tonight. We enjoy our first meal out as a family and (except for a stressful start with four kids of different ages) all went well. We see several people that we know and they are all happy to see us out like a normal family. Most people that see Zack now for the first time have a jaw dropping experience. He looks so good, like a regular teenager, only sweeter. We head home and the friends start to arrive. I got to visit with Dan's Mom and Kailyn's Mom, while Zack played pool and Scott talked with Kaitlyn’s Dad. By 11:00 there were only a few kids left and I was in the office working on the website. Occasionally I would get them a snack and the last group left at 12:30. Andrew is spending the night and I am sure that makes Zack very happy. As I clean up just the food stuff in the basement Zack comes over to tell me that it was a really good night. He said, “We didn’t think anybody was coming over but I had a lost of friends here tonight”. I don’t mind them at all staying even this late as long as I have to be up any way. I just want Zack to have his friend. I want them to be enjoy being here with him. It is a safe place for all of them and great therapy for Zack. I go back and read the website on this day three months ago. It was the day that Dr Mook came to University to assess Zack and tell me he would be able to transfer him to Frazier Rehab once his G-tube was placed. It was also the day that Karen (his physical therapist at University) told us that all kids wake up. We got 32 postings on that day from people giving encouragement. It is heartwarming to remember how many people were praying and how much their postings meant to us. I wonder how many are still reading and praying today. God has heard and answered the prayers of many people and I am eternally grateful for the blessings he has given us. We look at Zack now and see a future that 3 months ago seemed like a dream. We celebrate the miraculous healing that God has done this far and wait with great anticipation for what he has in store for us. Numbers 6:24-26 “The Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace”. We are more than at peace we have joy. Please pray for complete recovery.

Friday October 21, 2005

Friday October 21, 2005 Zack was up at 7:30 and had breakfast. He took a shower and was ready again before I was. Today he got to go on an outing to the mall with Suzanne and Scott (O.T.). He ran into Kara at the mall and she called me very excited that she saw him there. She said at first she was looking around for me but then saw Zack with a clip board and realized he was in therapy. He had to find different stores (2 stores that sold only shoes, 2 stores that carried jeans) and follow their instructions. He did very well until he was in Hollister and found a pair of pants he wanted to buy. He carried them to the cashier but Suzanne stopped him and said, “Don’t you think you better see if you have enough money to buy those?” He counted the money in his wallet and realized he didn’t have enough (of course, this is Hollister!) and he said “thank you for not letting me look like an idiot”. When I arrived to pick him up I brought his therapist the letter he wrote me at the beginning of the summer pleading his case to have his curfew increased (the one I read when I speak). I felt this letter would give them a good insight into who Zack was before his accident so that they could better understand them now. I finally got to meet Dr Peri (his psychologist) and he told Zack to show me his card trick. Zack had me draw a card and then put it back into them deck. One by one he would flip cards over until he found my card. Dr. Peri explained that Zack had watched him do the trick for another person earlier in the day and said he could do it. Dr. Peri said he had showed that trick to many people but no one had ever been able to do it after seeing it only one time. He was very impressed with Zack. He made arrangements with me to sit in on a session next week (I’m really looking forward to being able to be part of therapy again). We ride home and Zack calls his friends and makes arrangements for us to go bowling. Zack took a nap while I was making dinner. When Zack woke up Kyle came in to show me her tooth that just came out. She showed it to Zack and he noticed that it was bleeding. He said, “How’d you do that?” I wiggled it. “Why don’t you wiggle all of them?” Kyle answered “because I don’t want to loose all my teeth”. Zack came back into the kitchen and asked me, “Mom, am I going to lose all my teeth?” I had to explain that he had already lost all his teeth, one at a time, and wouldn’t be losing any more. He said he didn’t remember ever losing any teeth. After dinner, Taylor and Jessica arrive and the four of us head to the bowling alley to meet several more of Zack’s friends. After several games (Zack bowled great by the way) everyone goes to Trey’s house for Ping Pong and pool. Zack was not too excited that I was staying at Trey’s house but when he realized that I was going to sit upstairs with Trey’s parents he relaxed a little bit. He had fun with all his friends but was ready to go home before 11:00. When we got in the car he looked at the clock and commented that it was very late and he couldn’t wait to get home to go to bed. He asked if he could spend the night with Trey tomorrow and I had to explain that he wasn’t going to be spending the night with anybody for a while. He didn’t understand it but by the time we got home he was more interested in getting to bed than anything else. He had a fulfilling day in therapy and fun with his friends. I received a phone call today and will be speaking at KCD on Nov 7th at the Fellowship of Christian Athletes lunch meeting. I am excited to address a new group of teenagers and hope we have a big turn out. I have realized this is the best chance I have to get into the public schools and hope to be able to speak at Eastern and Manual as teens have requested. Teenagers are our future and we have to get them to realize the importance of the decisions they make today. However innocent those decisions may seem they can be destructive and teenagers need to be made aware that it can happen to them…just like it happened to Zack. He was athletic, popular, a good student who never gave us any trouble. He could be the poster boy for “this could never happen to me”. I am speaking now but wait until the day that Zack stands before his peers and gives his testimony. Remember 1st Corinthians 10:12 “Let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall”. Pray that God’s plan includes a speedy recovery so that Zack can influence many teenagers. But always pray for complete recovery.

Thursday October 19, 2005

Thursday October 20, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 for breakfast and a shower. He keeps asking me when he will get picked up to get his “head cut on” (he means get his stitches out). He had a short day of therapy before we had to be at University clinic at 12:00. He is very excited and seems a little hyper. He talks to all the nurses and is asking other patients if they were there to get their head cut on. He takes off his hat, shows them his stitches and asks if it will hurt when they take them out. I had given him a pain pill just in case but he is still very concerned that it will hurt. Our next door neighbor Kim made a phone call for us to the check in desk at the clinic to one of the staff she knows. We got into an exam room much quicker that the last time we were here. Once in an exam room we still had to wait for the doctor to show up from across the street at University Hospital. While we were waiting Zack decides he could take a few of these stitches out himself since they were very loose. He said the first one hurt so he sat down and waited for the doctor. He asked me, “When I get to heaven will my head be perfect?” Of course I told him not just his head but his whole body will be perfect. Then he decides we will take out another stitch because he is tired of waiting on the doctor. The second one doesn’t hurt as bad but he is concerned that the others will. He told me, “If it really hurts I will be holding your hand and screaming”. Then he asked what he should think about so that it wouldn’t hurt so badly and we decided that he should close his eyes, hold my hand and pretend that he was holding Jesus hand as they walked beside a stream of running water in heaven. He liked that idea so we took out a few more stitches ourselves and they didn’t hurt at all. Since it was one long continuous stitch we had about 4” hanging down the side of his head (I didn’t have scissors to cut it off) so I told him we should probably stop until the doctor got there. Dr Ross came in looked over his chart, glanced at his head and then had the nurse come in and remove the stitches (this was the same nurse that had been checking on us since we were put into the exam room). If the nurse was going to take them out I don’t know why we had to wait for the doctor in the first place. It didn’t hurt and Zack was relieved. We left the clinic and stopped by Frazier Rehab to see the staff there. He said the sidewalk from the parking garage looked familiar and then as we approached the entrance to Frazier he said, “I know this place”. I told him it should all seem very familiar since we walked these paths many times in 69 days he was there. Zack was able to lead me right to the gym, which is no small feat when you consider how far it is from the front door. We saw Kathy in speech, Amy in P.T. and Mary Beth in O.T. They were all surprised and happy to see how well Zack was doing. We talked with Amy the longest and she couldn’t get over how normal Zack was talking. She said she was going to cry. We invited her to come over and play pool with us (I think Zack would enjoy beating her since she beat him in bowling at our outing). We went up to 4 south and saw our nursing staff. Many of our friends were there and I think it gives them new incentives to be devoted to their chosen career when they see a patient like Zack doing so well. Zack said he didn’t remember their names but he did remember their faces. He kept taking off his hat and showing everyone his new round head with no stitches. The Frazier staff had never seen Zack with his bone flap on so he looked very different to them. We went home in time for Zack to take a shower before Katie and her friend came to interview him. They are Juniors at Assumption who decided to do a story on teenage driving and accidents for their broadcasting class. They interviewed Zack and I on how his accident happened and the impact it has had on our lives. Even though they already knew all about it they were still moved to tears during the interview. On camera Zack let me do most of the talking (he practiced his lines) but off camera he was the one entertaining everyone. We ate dinner with our family before heading to South Oldham High School for the girl’s soccer game against Christian Academy. At first it was a real treat to be able to sit with Zack and his friends in a social situation (especially since Zack didn’t seem to mind that I was there and never asked me to leave) but then it started to rain…then pour. We managed to make it half way through the second half of the game before Zack asked me again if I was ready to leave. I couldn’t wait to get into my dry, warm car. We left after making arrangements for several of his friends to come over to play pool. Back at our house, Zack and I got into dry clothes and waited for his friends to arrive. It wasn’t long before half dozen kids joined him in the basement for another game of pool. I am happy to have his friends here. I don’t know what Zack would do without them. They are his link to the teenage world out there, his world, and he wants to be normal. Even when he is tired and would rather be in bed he plays the host for his friends. It is the therapy that he thinks is important. I ask for your prayers that his friends will continue to seek his company even if he can’t do all the things they want to go do. I pray that they never give up that Zack will make a full recovery and be back in the halls of CAL. That they continue to give him encouragement, patience and friendship. Please pray for complete recovery and opportunities for us to amaze other people with the power of prayer and Gods awesome mercy.

Wednesday October 19, 2005

Wednesday October 19, 2005 Zack was up at 7:30 to eat breakfast and get dressed. He was ready to go before I was and sat down in the living room to watch TV. On the way to Frazier East he asked me, “Are you sure I have to go to school tomorrow?” (He calls Frazier school). Since Christian Academy was out of school on Thursday and Friday I thought he was telling me that he should be out too. I told him he had to go to therapy even if CAL was out of school and he said, “But what about this? (And took off his hat). They are fixing my head tomorrow.” Then I realized that he was talking about getting his stitches removed. He thought he would not go to therapy because last week when we went to the clinic he didn’t go to Frazier. His memory amazes me sometimes. He can remember something like getting his stitches out on a particular day (even though we hadn’t talked about it in several days) but he can’t remember what he did in therapy just hours ago. I talked to his primary therapist, Leslie in speech and she explained that a number of things were going on. Just like most people Zack is more likely to remember the things that he feels are important (specific activities with friends and medical procedures like the stitches coming out). Right now he doesn’t think therapy is important enough to remember specific details and that is something that they are trying to get across to him. She has been telling him that therapy is more important than school because it is going to help him for the rest of his life. Leslie also explained that he is having “cognitive return” which are the chemicals in the brain are stablelizing. There are many chemical reactions occurring in the brain all the time and when he had his accident it jumbled all those chemicals up. As they stablelize, his memory improves as well as the aphasia and other cognitive skills. The brain is complex and fascinating. I don’t understand how anyone who studies the human body and learns how intricately it is designed, could ever deny a divine creator. There is no way that “chance” could have put us together so intricately. Zack had a session with Dr. Perry (neuro psychologist) in the conference room as part of a group. It was called pragmatics and involves the highest level of communication. They discussed the ways we communicate besides words, like eye contact and body language. He also learned about self monitoring, learning common sense approaches to what is appropriate to say. Pragmatics is taught in a group setting because it enables you to assess yourself (and your deficits) compared to the other people in the group. It is a small group but involved people of different ages so he is able to see how an adult would respond in a particular situation and can evaluate his response accordingly. I feel fortunate that Zack gets to learn this way (it is almost like sending your teenager to etiquette classes). I think this is how the depth of character is developed that Dr. Kraft explained to me. Leslie told me that Zack is a very smart kid and that she is working with him on slowing down (particularly in his handwriting). He is used to school work coming easily for him and his natural habit was to do it quickly. Since he has a more difficult time paying attention (especially to details) he needs to work slower. She said that currently Zack is at a Rancho Scale of 5, 6, 7 swinging back and forth. He doesn’t always know what’s going on and acts inappropriately (5). Other times he still doesn’t quite understand what is going on but he acts appropriately (6). Now they are seeing him more often understand what is going on and has very intentional, appropriate behavior (7). As he recovers (cognitive return) the 5 and 6 behavior will disappear. Leslie said he is doing better every day and is pleased with his progress. She won’t yet discuss when he might be able to return to Christian Academy but she tells him every day that the harder he works in therapy (recognizing the importance of it) the sooner that will be. She said the best thing right now is for him to be involved in the social aspects of school (football game and dances) until he has recovered enough to handle the academic part of high school. Actually I think Zack has the best of both worlds. What teenager wouldn’t want to participate in the fun stuff at school without the pressures of test, reports and home work? Of course that is everyone’s goal…to get him back in school and leading a fulfilling, normal teenage life. Time is a critical factor in recovering from a traumatic brain injury. We are working on God’s timing and have to feel confident that His schedule is perfect. When He is ready for Zack to return to school it will happen. We ask that you continue to pray for healing and complete recovery. When you meat someone who is a hard-line evolutionist send them my way and I will introduce them to one of God’s divine creations.

Tuesday October 18, 2005

Tuesday October 18, 2005 Zack was up at 7:00 to eat breakfast and shower. He gets dressed and then when I tell him he needs to shave he asked, “How do I do that again”. He goes to the bathroom and once I get the shaving cream and razor out he remembers what to do. As we drive to Frazier East he turns on the radio and searches for his music. Some half rap song comes on and he asked me if I like it. Not really I tell him and he says, “You should, it’s a really good song”. We talk about our plans for after therapy today and I remind him we are going to see Andrew in the CAL Regional Soccer tournament. Then he remembers that they didn’t come to our house after Ping Pong and wants to call Andrew. Of course since it is nearly 8:30 Andrew is in class so he leaves him a message. I chuckled to myself as he told Andrew he was in trouble for not coming over but he would still be at his soccer game. It is a pretty day and Zack says he hopes they go outside again for therapy. I walk him in and kiss him goodbye. When I pick him up today he is in a much better mood than yesterday. I asked him what he did in therapy and he can’t remember but he says he knows they didn’t go outside. I tell him to get his binder out (where he keeps his schedule and log of his activities) and read what he wrote. He starts to read and then struggles over his own hand writing. He gives up, closes his binder, throws it on the floorboard of the car and smiles as he says, “I hate that thing”. I tell him it is so good that he doesn’t get frustrated over things because if he did it would be a lot harder. He looks at the cars driving by and tells me that he needs to get his license. I remind him that he has to take a special course and can’t even start it until his occupational therapist writes a letter explaining that he is ready to drive. He remembers that we are suppose to be doing something special today and asked me what it was. I tell him we are going to the CAL soccer game but right now we have to go by school and pick up Dylan and the girls. He asked me if we would have enough time and wanted to know if he had time for a nap. He doesn’t want to be late for the soccer game and must have asked me 4 times in 10 minutes what time the game was at. He also asked me several times if he would see any of his people when we went to school to pick up the kids and I tell him we will go in and look for people. We park and walk down the sidewalk. The buses pass us by and all the kids run to the window and wave at Zack. I tease him and say he is a celebrity. He smiles and says, “All I know is I better see my people in here”. We walk in through the elementary doors and Zack looks around disgustedly and says, “I don’t know any of these people”. Then we walk down to the high school wing and several people say hello to him but he does not see who he is looking for. As we enter the hallway to the gym we see the JV cheerleaders and I tell him he will definitely know some of those girls. He smiles and waves. We go through the gym and see Brooke practicing with the Varsity girl’s basketball team. He says, “I know that girl”. The Varsity cheerleaders are on the Mezzanine and they shout out his name. Zack says, “I want to go up there”. Several of the girls meet us at the top of the steps and he talks with them a while. Then I tell him I bet he will know people in the weight room. The room is full with the football team working out. Several guys come up to him and shake his hand. He tells each one, “Hey buddy, what’s up”. Someone asked him if he knew their name and he shakes his head and says, “I don’t remember a lot of things”. Someone must have asked him why because he looked at me and asked, “What happened to me again”. I remind him he was in a car accident and he just looks at them, grins and shakes his head. Mr. Stafford comes to shake his hand and Zack calls him buddy too. I tell them since Zack has a hard time remembering names he just calls everybody buddy. It’s safe and it works, most people don’t even catch on. We tell everybody goodbye and walk to the cafeteria to pick up the girls. Once at home Zack heads downstairs for a nap and I head to the office to open mail (those dreaded bills). When I finally wake Zack for dinner it is after 5:00 and he is very concerned that we will be late for the soccer game. We drop the kids off at the skating party and head for Ballard High School. Several people who haven’t seen Zack since before his accident are at the game and they are all amazed at how well he is doing. He watches the game and shouts out to Andrew. After the game we go to Fridays for a bite to eat with Andrew, Taylor and Brooke. Brooke’s Mom joins us later and Zack asked Brooke, “Who is that again?” (Of course it’s the lady who was cutting my bushes last night). Lauren and Abby show up and ask Andrew about his soccer game. Zack looks at Andrew and said, “You played soccer today?” I tell him we just left Andrews soccer game and he smiles and says, “Yeah and you all got beat bad” (which they had, 7 to 0). We head home and Zack tells me he is tired and wants to go to bed. I tell him he talked to several people on the phone and told them to come over so he couldn’t go to bed. He lays his head back in the car and says, “I wish I wouldn’t have done that because I am really tired”. Shortly after we get home Tiffany and Brittany arrive. Zack visits with them in the living room. He asked me, “Who was that girl I told you I wanted to go out with?” I smile to myself. My teenage son needs me and I have an opportunity to mold his social life. What parent wouldn’t want to be in that position? After a short time he looks at his friends and says, “Don’t you all need to study for something?” His polite way of telling them they needed to leave because he was tired. He walks them to the door and gives them each a hug goodbye. He was asleep before they reached the entrance to our subdivision. I am happy and satisfied that Zack is well on the road to recovery. I pray that he will always be able to laugh at his little mistakes instead of getting frustrated (just as long as he is aware that he is making mistakes and tries to correct them). I have received so many emails recently about how his accident has changed lives. I am still getting comments about my speech at Chapel. My mission is to tell other teenagers how innocent choices can change their lives forever, how God gave them parents as authority over them to help them make good choices and how prayer can heal. Every time I hear of one of Zack’s friends having an accident or getting in trouble for doing something stupid, I feel a sense of urgency to get my message out. Sometimes I think it needs to be beat over their head but maybe a few eye opening pictures of Zack lying in a hospital bed with a shaved head and tubes coming out of him will do the trick. Any church that wants me to speak to their youth group need only to ask. One day I hope Zack is the one addressing them but until then God won’t let me be silent. Please continue to pray for complete healing. Pray that Zack maintains his sense of humor through this recovery process and that he continues to amaze his doctors. There is only one explanation, one factor that is not considered in recovery…the power of prayer and the mercy of our awesome God!

Monday October 17, 2005

Monday October 17, 2005 Zack slept until 7:30 and ate a big breakfast. I wonder when the rest of the kids are going to decide they are too good for cereal. As we drive to Frazier East we talk about going to Taylor’s to play Ping Pong when they get home from school. When I picked him up he was very quiet on the way home and seemed to be in a bad mood. I asked him what happened in therapy today and of course he said he didn’t remember. I asked him questions and he said they went outside to look for chocolate. I inquired if his therapist had hid chocolate outside for him to find and he said, “No, it was just there”. I told him we could look in his notebook and see what he did today but he was more interested in when we were going to Taylor’s to play Ping Pong. I find it interesting that he can’t remember what he did in therapy but can remember a conversation from this morning. I know my kids have “selective hearing” at times but now I think Zack has “selective memory”. I’ll have to ask his therapist. When we get home I pull his binder out and look at the days activities. After Speech I notice he had “seasoning” and I can’t imagine what they might do in that therapy. I decide to call Lesley C (the therapist that he listed in the “who” column) and ask her about it. She laughed when she told me that she should have looked over what he had written because he had “reasoning” group with her. This therapy is done with several other patients and it emphasizes deductive reasoning and problem solving, concrete verses abstract thinking, recognizing similarities and differences, recognizing relevant information and organizing thoughts. Zack will have several different types of group therapy. He will be in group with patients of different recovery phases and it will help him see the deficits caused by traumatic brain injury. Lesley told me that she likes her group sessions to be fun so they play a lot of games. For deductive reasoning they played Battleship and Zack won (even though at times he had trouble recognizing some of the letters). Then she taught him how to play Rummy and he caught on quickly but they didn’t have enough time to finish the game. We head to Taylor’s house to meet Andrew and Trey and play Ping Pong. He really is not excited about me staying there while they play and I get a break when Taylor calls to say her Mom wasn’t going to be home so the only way they could come over was if I stayed. Not a problem. Zack enjoyed playing and his friends were kind enough to take it easy on him although they didn’t let him win. He is dancing to the music while he’s playing and everyone is enjoying watching him. I am fascinated that this kid that should have died, who couldn’t walk or talk just two months ago, is now dancing and playing Ping Pong, cracking silly jokes. God is awesome! Time to go home for dinner so Zack makes them promise to come to our house later. After dinner Kaitlyn and her Mom come over and we play a game of “Golf” (the card game). Before it’s over, Brooke and her Mom arrive and Zack and Dylan play a game of pool against Kaitlyn and Brooke. All of this is therapy for Zack. It teaches him socialization (not that he has lacked for any social activity since the moment he opened his eyes). Time for the Apple Pie and ice cream that Trey’s Mom sent over. As I walk Kaitlyn and her Mom to the front door Zack comes to tell me, “Mom that lady is cutting your bushes”. We look at him puzzled but then I can hear Brooke’s Mom in the kitchen washing the dishes. I tell him you mean she is washing the dishes. He laughs and says, “Yeah, that’s it”. That’s aphasia. Fortunately Zack does not get frustrated with himself and usually laughs when he says something funny. Another blessing since most people with traumatic brain injury suffers from lots of frustration, anger and depression. God has been so good to us, letting this little project of His show how He answers prayers, but sparing Zack many of the typical symptoms. He shows us everyday how He planned for His church to work How He intended His children to be a community that supports one another. We are so fortunate to be the example, to feel the outpouring of love and support. Many days it is overwhelming. Zack is healing. We see improvements in him everyday. Most are subtle, not like the big landmarks of walking and talking, but they are steps towards recovery. The next one will be clarity of reading (and maybe to par a hole in golf). Please continue to pray for complete recovery so God can be glorified.

Sunday October 16, 2005

Sunday October 16, 2005 Zack slept in his own bed last night and woke up on his own at about 9:00. He came upstairs hungry so I decided to teach him how to make pancakes. He ate two before I had any ready for Logan and I asked him if he wanted another one. He said he did but he didn’t want me to have to make it. He is much more considerate. I took Zack to the High School worship service today. The youth minister acknowledged Zack and then asked where his friends were the night of the accident and the weeks preceding. He challenged all the teenagers there to hold each other accountable, to be brave enough to tell their friends when they think they are doing something wrong. It is a lesson that all of them needed to hear and I hope they learn it well now that they can watch Zack live it. They passed out puzzle pieces and each person had to go on stage to add their piece to the puzzle. As Zack walked across the stage he turned a grinned at everyone and I couldn’t help thinking how uninhibited he is now. He doesn’t worry about being cool but he does want to be normal. He didn’t want me sitting with him even though his friends don’t care. It doesn’t hurt my feelings (well maybe a little bit) because I know he just wants to be like everyone else and none of his friends have their mother hanging around. After church Scott took him to hit balls and then play golf with Andrew and Trey. Scott told me he was watching him on the green laughing and goofing off with his friends. It was a scene he thought he would never see again and it made him cry. Zack didn’t play that bad but he played much worse than he did before the accident. I think it is only a matter of time a practice before he gets his golf game back. We pray that he is able to try out for the golf team next year since his baseball days are over. He takes a nap when he gets home. Brittney and Kara meet us at our house to ride with us to church for the Vine service. Zack is excited that the girls are riding with us and then asked me if I had to sit with them (get over it!). The sermon was good and the music was perfect. I was afraid that it would be too loud and the lights too distracting for Zack but he loved it. I asked him if the music was too loud and he said no, he liked the music. He sang and I saw him watching the screen. I asked him if he could read the words and he said yes. It would be just like our awesome God to take away all the obstacles for Zack to read in order to worship him. Some songs he already knew but others were new and I could tell he was reading the words off the screen. Zack saw people raising their hands in worship and said he liked that. It was great to be there with him and we saw many of his friends. When we got home Tiffany had stopped by and we ate pizza. The girls went through a little photo album I had put together of Zack and his friends (to help him remember their names) and talked about school. Zack told Kara that he was definitely going to the Winter Ball. He said he might be going with her but he wasn’t sure. He also told her that he was going to be back in school with them soon. We talked about his accident and I reminded him that he had snuck out of his bedroom window. We discussed how you shouldn’t hang around with people older than you because you can end up in trouble. I’m not sure he believed me on the events leading up to the accident that night until the girls chimed in. I also explained that he could never smoke or drink because of his head injury or he would have seizures, but it was still OK to kiss girls. He agreed that that was a pretty good trade off as long as he could still kiss girls. It is obvious that he doesn’t remember the accident or the consequences of his actions that night. I told him he would have to sleep on a mattress in our room for the rest of his life if he didn’t agree to not sneak out of the house. He kept asking us then, “What am I not supposed to do?” Then he would repeat after us “No sneaking out of the house”. I hope many teenagers and preteens realize the decision that Zack made that night, to sneak out and go for a ride with a boy 3 years older than him, is why he is missing out on some of the best times of his teenage years. There is nothing out there worth three months of your life, your memory, your reading skills, your Junior retreat. Those that stay tucked safely in their beds at night are guaranteeing themselves a future. Learn to live the promises of God in scripture. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. Jeremiah 29:11
Pray that through Zack’s struggle many teens will learn to be content with the boundaries their parents set for them. Please pray for Zack to retrieve his reading skills and for a complete recovery.

Friday October 14, 2005

Friday October 14, 2005 Zack was early to Frazier this morning so he would have time to write his schedule into his daily binder. I received a phone call from his primary therapist, Leslie in speech and she said they need to work with him another week before they could make any determination on specific therapies. She did however feel pretty confident that Zack had “visual agnosia” which is a perception problem. It can not be corrected by glasses or surgery but rather through vision therapy. Like aphasia, agnosia also gets better with time, but is greatly improved with proper therapy. They will teach Zack new methods of reading. She explained that they could spell entire sentences for him and he knew exactly what they were saying but if they wrote that same sentence he would have difficulty reading it (visual perception). She said we could work with him at home but it should be fun things that he would want to do, like playing cards. I think we know a few card games he enjoys. Zack’s friends began arriving around 6:00 and we fed them. We were going to the Christian Academy Varsity Football game and Zack was very excited (so was I). Once at the game Zack is ready for me to leave him with “his people”. They sit in the bleachers and I am banished to be with the adults. Everyone was so glad to see him there and amazed at how well he looked. He is surrounded by his friends and the girls watch over him. At one point I looked up and saw him sitting with Matt Rivard (the driver in the accident). I found out that he told Matt “I am in big trouble”. These guys jumped me and I got into a fight”. Then he took off his hat and showed him his head. Just before half time I went to where they were sitting. We walked to the concession stand and Zack got something to drink. I was standing nearby talking with some adults when I saw Zack take off his hat and show the girls his head. Then he motioned for me and asked, “How did I do this again?” I told him he was in a car accident and he shrugged his shoulders, nodded his head and put his hat back on. Since he doesn’t remember it, half the time he doesn’t believe he was in an accident. Shortly before the game is over we decide we will go to BW3’s, a restaurant that our family used to frequent a lot before the accident. His friends agree to meet us there. As we walk out of the game Zack is stopped by many people wishing him well and girls giving him hugs. He is patient (even though he is anxious to get to the restaurant) and talks to everyone. When we walk away I tell him he was very polite and he says, “I have to be”. In the car I review with him who everyone was that was sitting with him at the game. He gets mixed up on a few of the names and I am describing people. When I get to Randi Marshall and ask him if he knows which girl she is and he says, “She’s the one that really loves Christ”. What do you mean? He says, “What are those people called who really love Christ?” Do you mean Christians? “Yeah, she looks like one of those”. I ask him what he means and he says, “She acts like she really loves Christ”. I tell him when we get to the restaurant he has to tell Randi that because it will really make her feel good. Then I remember watching Randi with Zack in the stands, smiling and talking with him. She talked with me as well and told me how sweet Zack was and that she wanted to just squeeze him. She saw his sweetness and he saw Christ in her. I think God was smiling down on both of them. This accident has affected many people besides our family. At the restaurant I see Zack in the midst of “his people”, laughing and watching them. He must be getting a sense of what his life was like prior to his accident. He catches my eye occasionally and one time called me over and said, “Why am I in trouble again?” I tell him you are not in trouble, you were in an accident. “Yeah, I was in an accident” and smiles. That smile that lightens up the room, that I longed for so desperately in the days immediately after his accident, comes easily now. I am deliriously happy. Our life is better than ever because we recognize how blessed we are. One of God’s miracles lives in our house. His hand is evident each time I see Zack smile. We may never know how many people have been changed by this tragedy until we enter the gates of heaven, but I get a glimpse of it in the postings I receive. Please continue to pray for an end to the aphasia and successful vision therapy. Pray for complete healing for the Glory of God.
Psalm 100:4 Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise. Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.

Thursday October 13th, 2005

Thursday October 13th, 2005 Zack helped make his own breakfast this morning of scrambled eggs, bagels and fruit. He was excited to be going to Christian Academy and kept asking “will my people be there” (that would be his friends). When we arrived we had to sneak him into the school so no one would see him because we wanted it to be a surprise. As the middle school sang “I will never be the same again” Donna brought him up a side aisle where I was and sat him next to Dylan. Although I gave almost the identical speech it was more emotional this time. Every time I looked at Zack he would smile while the rest of the audience was crying. Before long, tears were streaming down my face but I was composed enough to complete my speech. The entire middle school prayed for him and then we hid him back stage as the high school entered the auditorium. He was dancing around to the music behind the curtain and saying “my people are out there”. As we looked for the separation in the curtain I took his hand and he looked at me very concerned and said, “You can’t hold my hand Mom ‘cause my friends don’t know I do that”. He obviously has forgotten the many times they walked the halls with us at Frazier and I held his hand. I think they understand that after nearly losing him and then willing him back to life, I am entitled to hold his hand sometimes. They sang and then introduced him as the special guest. Zack came out grinning to a standing ovation. Then they presented us with a $10,000 check that was raised by selling t-shirts (700 students were wearing CAL loves ZH shirts). It was very emotional and Zack quietly kept saying thank you. There is so much love, prayers and support I could just feel God cheering with us saying “Look at my people”. We stayed for the High school chapel and Zack got to sit with “his people” and had pictures taken by the Courier Journal and all his friends. Then we headed to University Medical Clinic to have his stitches removed. As we drive downtown he asked me if it was going to hurt and would there be blue stuff running down his face. I ask him if he means blood and remind him that blood was red. He said, “O.K. will I have red stuff running down my face?” Before we enter the building I take a phone call and we stop on the sidewalk. Zack keeps looking at the people coming out and asking them if they got their head fixed. Then he would take off his ball cap and show them his head and tell them he was getting his stitches out. It was quite amusing. He talked to every body in the waiting room and when we checked in he asked me again, “Is it going to hurt?” I don’t think so. “How do you know?” Because I won’t let them hurt you. I’m in big trouble if this hurts but fortunately I remembered and gave him a pain pill right before we came in. We see Dr. Janjua walk in and he asked us “What are you doing here?” I respond, “We are getting our stitches out”. He says, “Already?” I am very surprised and say, “You told us to schedule the appointment for today”. He just shrugged his shoulders and walk away, saying he would get us right in. I filled out several sets of paperwork (it seemed for each hour we waited I had to fill out more). Zack had to go to the bathroom so we walked down the hall. I told him to hurry because they might call our name. After sitting back down for another 15 minutes Zack asked, “Did anybody come out for us when I was in the pooping room?” I couldn’t help but laugh and told him, “You mean the bathroom”. His aphasia is at the stage where he gets his point across he just has a different way of saying it because he can’t always remember the name of the object (or place) he wants to say. He looks around at all the people waiting and then at the clock (it is already 3:30). He tells me, “I don’t think we are getting out of here anytime soon”. I’m afraid he is right. Finally at 4:30 we are called back to an exam room. Dr. Doss comes in to talk with us and is amazed. He hasn’t seen Zack since we left University in July and he can’t believe how well he is doing. He told Zack the last time he saw him all he could do was lay in bed and moan. He shows us the CAT scan and Dr. Harpring comes in to discuss the results. There is definite improvement from his CAT scan prior to the bone flap replacement. There is still a little bit of fluid (visibly evident at his right temple) but that would be absorbed. Everything looks fine and he should continue to recover but it is too early to take the stitches out. The ones on the side and back could come out but the ones on the top (where they had to reopen to remove the drain) were not ready. Zack seemed disgusted that they were not taking the stitches out and that he still couldn’t wash his hair (not that he has much). We scheduled another appointment for next Thursday and said goodbye. Zack was very tired since he hadn’t had a nap today. As soon as we got home he was in bed. After dinner several of his friends arrive and he plays pool. Our system seems to be down to a science. We are so happy that his friends want to come hang out with him because they are a big part of his recovery. I think of the song we sang today and how appropriate it is for Zack. We will never be the same again but we are genuinely happy. We have that peace that passes all understanding and we can’t wait to see what the future holds. Zack is a unique human being, a child of God with tangible evidence of His love. Continue to stay with us through his recovery and pray that the Glory of God will be revealed in its completeness.

Wednesday October 12, 2005

Wednesday October 12, 2005 Zack got to sleep late this morning and ate a big breakfast (I’m spoiling him but we will get to cereal later). As we drive to Frazier East I tell him tomorrow is a big day. He asked why and I explain that it is Zack Hornback Day at Christian Academy and everyone is wearing their t-shirts. He smiles. I tell him I am also going to speak at the middle school chapel. He asked what I am going to say. I explain that I will tell everyone how hard it has been for him to recovery from his accident and how their prayers have really helped. He says, “That’s good”. Then I tell him that one day he will be giving his testimony on how God carried him through this and he says, “That’s bad. I can’t do it”. I tell him of course he can because I’m going to teach him. He replies simply, “O.K.”. I prepare in my mind how emotional that day will be when Zack stands before his peers with a personal warning of how their choices can change them forever. Then he reminds me that tomorrow they were taking his stitches out and he asked me if anything could go wrong. I understand his apprehension since a very simple procedure of removing the drain last week turned into surgery. I tell him nothing can go wrong at the doctors but I could get real nervous and throw up right before my speech. That makes his smile even as he says “don’t do that”. We arrive early at Frazier and I let them know that Zack won’t be there because of his doctor’s appointment. He tells his speech therapist that they are going to “fix my head”. She tells me to keep an eye on the swelling at his temple. I have noticed it seems slightly larger but I remember that Dr. Janjua said it could be swollen for several weeks. Zack puts his lunch in the refrigerator and asked his therapist for his schedule. She tells him he has to go into the community room and write his schedule into his binder. They are teaching him to be responsible for knowing what he is doing, with whom, where and when. He tells me goodbye and we begin another day. Zack took a long nap when he got home today and Scott had dinner ready when I arrived with Dylan and the girls. Scott told me he was taking Zack and Dylan to hit golf balls. Zack inhaled his dinner and kept asking Dylan if he was ready to go. While they were gone I decided it was a good time to get out some decorations. The girls were excited as we went to the basement to drag up pumpkins and scarecrows. Once outside I decided to weed around the bushes and realized it was the first truly normal thing I had done around the house in months. Isn’t it strange that it feels good to get back to household duties? You never know how precious those menial tasks are until they are snatched away from you. When the boys return Scott fills me in on Zack’s first attempts at hitting a golf ball. Zack was a good golfer and was preparing to try out for the golf team the week after his accident. Scott said he swung about six times and missed the ball completely. He looked at his Dad in despair and Scott told him don’t worry I can fix this. He set Zack up in the right position and before long he was driving the ball 250 yards (it’s a good thing because he has to prepare for his big golf match against Dave Stone and Sam). Scott was so happy and Zack was delighted that he made his Dad proud. As Scott tells me, he gets choked up and reminds me that when Zack was in the hospital he couldn’t help thinking about how they loved to play golf together. He said he got his best friend back. A couple of Zack’s friends stop in for a quick game of pool. I remember that I haven’t given him his antibiotic and take it downstairs. I tell him I am a bad nurse because this pill was almost 2 hours late. He said, “No your not. You’ve been good”. Wow, to be appreciated by your teenage son. Once they leave Zack comes into the office where I am preparing to work at the computer. He says he wants to get on it and asked if he could have the chair too. I comply, anxious to see what he will do. Some things never change… a teenager, a computer and instant messaging. His fingers naturally covered the keyboard. He typed much better than he could read what was being sent to him. He would ask me what it said to be sure he understood before he answered. I will emphasize to his therapist that focusing on reading is a priority. I hope to find out by the end of this week if they feel it is necessary to send him to an optometrist to check his vision. I am interested to see how accurate they can test his vision with the aphasia present. Zack checks the time and tells me in ten minutes he is going to bed. At 9:00 he signs off with a promise to call the girl he is chatting with. He heads to bed and calls for Toby (our Terrier) to come sleep with him. I tuck the girls in and head to the office. I will have plenty of time to get some “Zack work” done. I put off going through medical bills and opt for my therapy…this site. Thanks for listening, for being an important part of my recovery, for prayers and words of encouragement. Please pray that God will give back the ability to read for Zack. Please pray for Zack to embrace scripture again. To be able to read the words of Paul in Philippians 4:11 “I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content”. Continue to pray for complete recovery.

Tuesday October 12, 2005

Tuesday October 11, 2005 Zack slept until 7:45 when I woke him to eat and get dressed. As we were riding to Frazier East he told me, “That thing that Dad does woke me up”. I asked him what thing and he responded, “With his mouth”. “Do you mean snoring?” “Yeah, snoring”. We had to call Scott and tell him I now have proof of his snoring. We ride for a little bit and he asked me, “Did you get in trouble for not being at your thing last night?” I don’t know what thing he is talking about so he says, “You know that thing you go to everyday”. I figure out he is talking about work and I tell him no I didn’t get in trouble. I have a great boss and they understand. He responds, “That’s good”. He is not self centered like the information I read told me he could become after a brain injury. I am reminded again how many symptoms/phases I was warned about that Zack never went through or it was so mild we hardly noticed. He definitely hasn’t followed their typical recovery path and our only explanation is that God has taken him on a different path. Another way prayer has made an impact and the glory of God will be the focus. I walk him in and will be leaving him for the first time. He seems ready for it, tells me he loves me and walks away. I have to sit in my car quietly for a moment just thinking of how far we have come. I drive to work and make phone calls on his behalf. Trying to see if some meds can be discontinued (I really don’t think we need anything for blood pressure any more), scheduling the appointment to have his stitches removed (Thursday) and calling school to see if they have everything for the chapel program Thursday. Donna will pick Zack up today and bring him home. She arrives early and sits in on his P.T. assessment. As they prepare to leave Zack tells her he wants to show her something. He takes her to the community room and gets his empty lunchbox out of the refrigerator. He remembered on his own that he put it in there after lunch. She was very impressed. Once at home he grabs his pillow and blanket and heads down to his room for a nap. We have another meal together as a family (how wonderful) and prepare for visitors. Several of Zack’s friends come over to play pool. They discuss Junior Ring Ceremony and want to know if Zack will be able to come. Prior to his accident, when it was time to order class rings, Zack said he didn’t want one, he wouldn’t wear it, just give me the money. Now that I am not sure if he will graduate with the class of 2007 I am glad I didn’t order a ring. He asked one of the girls how far into the school year they are and then tells me he needs to “get finished this week”. I tell him he won’t be ready to go back to school for a while. He tells me he is going to work real hard and then puts his head in his hands. I tell him he could go to summer school and maybe catch up but it would be really hard. He says he’s got to do it. He really wants to get back to school and have a normal teenage life. As soon as the last visitor leaves Zack tells me he is ready for bed. It looks like fatigue will be the negative result of this injury, but as a mother of a teenager I don’t mind him being in bed every night at 9:30. We feel so blessed to have him at all. He is on the road to recovery and we thank everyone that has cheered us along the way. Your prayers and words of encouragement have been the fuel for our journey. Please continue to pray for complete recovery. Please pray that God will soon have Zack walking the halls at Christian Academy again. To God be the Glory!

Monday October 10, 2005

Monday October 10, 2005 Zack slept until 7:30 but then Kyle wanted me to wake him up so they could say goodbye before they left for school. The kids are so happy to have him home and my fears that they would irritate him haven’t been realized. Zack is patient and actually seems to enjoy their company. He is ready to begin his new education at Frasier East. We arrive at 8:30 and fill out paperwork. Toni Waddell (recreational therapist and acting case manager) takes us on a tour of the facility. Then she asked Zack if he could get back to the lobby. He made it with only minimal help, which I would have needed myself. Then it was time for his first meeting with his speech therapist. He found her office on his own and I was very impressed. His speech therapist is Leslie Becker-Powell and I liked her right away. She directed her questions to Zack and he answered correctly (name, siblings, where did you go to school and what do you like to do). He got stuck on when was your accident and looked to me. She was mainly testing his memory and was interested when I told her Zack had fluent aphasia. She changed her methods and was directing questions that would highlight any deficits in this area. He did excellent on the math word problems involving time when she read them to him but reading them himself was difficult. She thinks he has a vision problem and said that his O.T. therapist would discover it. Leslie explained that there are 4 systems of language: reading, writing, talking and comprehension. Usually they find a patient is weak in one or two areas and strong in others. They have to discover the strengths and work on those to compensate for the weak areas. She also gave me a good definition of aphasia- the loss of language skills due to a brain injury. Zack kept looking around for the clock (she didn’t have one) so she told me Zack should be wearing a watch. They expect their clients to be independent, carry their own schedule, know where they are supposed to be and at what time and know how to get there. Zack was a little worried about the added responsibility, especially when he found out I wasn’t going to be with him everyday. I was downright scared until Leslie told me there would be aides to help him.. We moved to O.T. therapy with Suzanne and a student named Scott (Zack is always glad when there is another guy around). She had him do several letter and symbol searches and timed him. He thought he did very well and was proud of himself. She picked up right away on some vision difficulties that she labeled “perception” problems. She said 80% of people with brain injuries have vision problems. They will continue to evaluate him this week and then probably send him to a behavioral optometrist (never knew there was such a person). They use Dr. Wienberg who specializes in vision difficulties due to brain injuries. Once they address the problem we should see a lot of improvement in reading. Suzanne asked Zack if he noticed any differences since his accident and at first he said no. Then he said it was harder to read. I reminded him about his mixed up words and he agreed. Then he said he was tired a lot. We head to group lunch in the community room. There are only 4 other patients eating with us and 3 therapist. After lunch they have a group orientation where everyone explains how they got injured and offered advice to the others and how to cope with it. Zack leaned over to me and asked “How long are we here?” When I told him until 3:00 he made a face and said, “I tell you one thing, when I get home I’m getting in that bed”. We ended the day with review with Erin, a speech aide. She asked him what he did at certain times of the day and he is allowed to reference his schedule to determine the activity. Then he has to explain the purpose of that activity. He couldn’t remember what he did in O.T. When I told him what he did he said he still didn’t remember and then he said, “It’s like I’m retarded”. Both Erin and I assured him that it was only a lapse in memory due to the accident and therapy would help him regain it. It was heartbreaking to see Zack so critical of himself. We finished and headed to the community room to get his things. As soon as we got home he was ready to take a nap and informed me that he was sleeping in his room. Janet Smith (his 8th grade science teacher) dropped by with a bunch of snacks for the kids. She knew that we would have a lot of visitor and how those teenagers like to eat. When Zack got up we were able to sit down at our kitchen table and enjoy our first meal together as a family in over 3 months. It was wonderful (another great meal provided by one of the many people that have taken care of our family from the beginning). Zack’s friends start to arrive and we head downstairs to play pool. When it was time for bed I tucked Zack in and he was smiling ear to ear. He is so happy to be home that it doesn’t even bother him that he has to sleep in our room (on a mattress on the floor). He would like to be in his own room but he doesn’t argue about it. How’s that for another blessing…a teenager that doesn’t argue. I go downstairs and talk with Scott awhile before sitting down at my computer. I read postings from the weekend and answer emails. I find myself asleep with my hand on the mouse and decide that the world could wait one day to hear about his first day in outpatient therapy. I am in bed before 11:00 with a smile on my face. I am so thankful that he is home, that prayers have been answered, that we have so many people reaching out to us and that God’s hand has been evident in our tragedy since day one. We are learning to trust in our heavenly father like little children. It is hard because sometimes that adult need to control our situation creeps in and we panic realizing that we aren’t equipped to deal with this. Then God takes over and all is well. His perfect plan still unfolds. Please continue to pray for complete healing. Pray that young lives will be changed by hearing me speak at Christian Academy. I will address the Middle School at Chapel on Thursday Oct 13th at 10:00 AM
I will explain how seemingly innocent choices can change lives forever and the power of prayer. This is also the day that the entire student body has an opportunity to be out of uniform wearing T-shirts that say "CAL loves ZH Stay the Course". I am honored to be speaking and ask for your prayers that hardened hearts may be touched by my message. Again, pray that I remember to breathe.